Big Girl Boots

We're squeezed into an over crowded bar, dead center with people packed in like ground meat in a casing all around us. Our group has taken up a fair share of the bar, so in my efforts to get a drink, I have to alternate with hugs and kiss hellos. Oh and it's hot as hell, if hell was sitting in the kitchen with my mother as she attempted to cook.

Good thing I'm not wearing much! We get to the bar where a branch of our group has secured a window, currently they are ordering shots of Grand Manier ::burns so good:: A couple of guys eye us up and hand us shots.

"Don't waste these."
I'm pretty sure I'll be able to handle it, a smirk reaches the corner of my lips.

We take the shots, that were really like double shots, without even a little wince. The original guy looks to me and says

"Whoa! You took that like a big girl"
Uh huh.
I narrow my eyes at him to gauge his doubt, while he sizes me up. My outfit tonight is pretty casual, layered tank tops, (Black and White) black tights and black knee high boots. His eyes get to my boots and widen...

"No wonder! Look at those boots!"
Yup, my big girl boots.
"Damn! Just tell me what's the cut and color you want?"

C and I catch eyes across the crowded bar, both knowing it's time to move on. This is our second stop of the night, we started at Mate in Georgetown for Organic Cucumber Mojitos in honor of Earth Hour. This small bar appearance was for a birthday, moving across town to see another birthday girl, this particular party is a green party. Finally making our way out of the bar, we run into more friends outside, I give them a outline of the night ahead and we hop into the car.

We arrive at Senso, Senso...not my fav place on 18th street. It always has the strangest smell...like day old-dirty recliner-sex ::come on, you know the smell:: As we walk through the door my eyes go to the back balcony, of which I see the girls dangling from. We make our way through another crowded room and climb the stairs into a very warm loft, filled with girls in green, a couple large fans, a small bar with the worlds slowest bartender...ever. As this is our third stop of the night we jump right in to the dance party. Round of birthday shot, a few photo ops, and a we're putting our jackets on again. This time the expected right up the street party has moved a few blocks away.
Once outside we're trying to map out the best way to pick up a couple more girls and make it to the next stop in a timely manner. All this planning is broken up when I here my name being screamed across six lanes of traffic. Followed by a flurry of text, friends at a club across the street are outside and want in. I make a mad dash, while sending my text , by the time I get across the street, they are being ushered inside and geared up with bracelets. I'm tempted to come in for a quick drink and say hi, but we've got a tight schedule as it is. Just when I'm hugging hellos, the car pulls up friends already inside and we're off the 14th street.
We make it to The Park and the party is in full force by this point the birthday boy is dancing all over the place, pouring Champagne on everyone and buying round after round of shots. I've danced so much tonight, there is no need for exercise for another couple of days! But I find myself and C three drinks in and dancing our asses off! Per our usual I'm fighting guys off of her and telling them that she is my bitch, we laugh as the walk away utterly confused wondering if we really are lesbians ::ftr I like boys::
The DJ plays every song I love, so I've just got no other option than to dance until my legs are jelly. We're laughing at how tired we are by the end of the night and amazed that we are still able to have a conversation after the night we'd just had.
Our night ends like so many good one, C and I are walking down the sidewalk linked arm in arm, laughing uncontrollably. We're also content. That alone makes the night, to see all these people, go so many places and be utterly content at the end of the night.
I love this city.
-n

Grande Tree with No Foam

I stand in my Starbucks behind a gentleman, late fifties to early sixties. He orders his hot beverage with room. As he waits, he picks up a travel mug, it is green with writing all over it. He angles it towards the cashier and says
'Whats all this nonsense on here?'
She replies, That is 'Green' travel mug, the writing is telling you how much recyclable material was used to make it.
'Why would you walk around with all this on your cup?'
His voice has raised a little, he puts the cup down, shakes his head and looks to me as I step up to order my drink. Before the words leave my mouth the cashier recognizes me and fills in the order for me, then she reaches out her hand. I hand her my travel mug, the very green, very re-usable, the very same mug the gentleman had just had in his hand.
I look him in the eyes and saw an internal struggle of what to say, stick to his point or not. Nothing came out of his mouth, so I offered
I proudly walk around with this cup, I have the whole set, and I tell everyone who ask me about it. I also save ten cents every time I bring my cup with me and the cost of paper cup, paper holder, plastic top.
Do you have grandchildren?
'Yes, of course.' Slight defense in his voice now.
Do you want their grandchildren to have trees? Because while you've grown up with trees and your children have, there are children who might not if we continue on this path.
We're not hippies, or tree huggers, we're all trying to do our little part to conserve. That's all.
The attention of the line is on us both now, and I don't mind nor do I feel bad for this old soul. He looks to me, nods his head and says
' Maybe I'll bring in my black mug.'
With that he turns and walks away, I pay the cashier and move to the waiting area. While he puts cream and sugar in his coffee, I take the opportunity to tell the barista all about my sat night plans for Earth Hour. She is excited and tells me she wants to join and I give her the web address, I think he listened in as well.
Earth Hour is a great cause, but really it's about conservation all the time, every little bit helps.
So turn off your lights this Saturday from 8:30 - 9:30pm, I'm sure you can figure out something to do with an hour of darkness. I've gotten business all around the DC are to offer support, let's do this together. I'll be drinking organic martinis if you were wondering!
-n

Comfort Found Next Door

'Don't mind her, she's grumpy'.

I'm running late, I hate running late. My last tweet for the night says it all 'grumpy and hungry'. The nights plan is to pickup C after she has a drink with the sinnersaint, he is my male counter part. C will go through two levels of checks and balances mainly he and I. While he means well and tries to be nice ::don't we all:: he is really bad, not in the worst way, but bad enough...thus the sinnersaint is born. She calls with an update on my way, you almost ready? I lie, uhhuh picking out my outfit now. My hair is soaking wet and I don't have a lick of an idea what I'm going to wear. Going with curly hair tonight so that is not a biggie, an outfit...something that everyone will see, remember and talk about behind my back. No pressure at all, guys have no idea how lucky they are, jeans and button-down...spoiled is what. As per my usual my outfits start with the shoes, tonight I choose Patent Grey, Black piping and Black stiletto. The outfit black on black, short skirt of offset the long legs, backless blouse ::yes, backless is a fav of mine::
Jewelry on, quick spritz of 'lure them in' and I'm out the door. Twenty minutes after I told C that I was twenty minutes away. Luckily when I call her she is still looking for parking, I give a dramatic huff and tell her I am looking as well, even though I am still clearly on the highway. She calls when she finds parking and ask if she should wait for me, I tell her to go on in...as I'm still blocks away.
A shot later I meet C inside our second home, we call it that cause everyone there is like family, dis functional and we wish it was home cause the booze is always flowing. Also, who doesn't like walking into a place where when there are no seats, they make them appear for us. She is laughing and flirting as I walk in, I'm handed a shot and it's followed up with a glass of wine. As I look around the place is packed. Too packed to be able to get something to eat, and I've yet to eat today. Before the drinking rolls into full force I decide we need to eat, also I can feel myself getting grumpy. While I'm generally a perky little thing, you catch me with an empty stomach and I'll rip yours out. So I suggest we move to another venue, the move is prompted by a text that promises good dinner.
As we walk through the doors of Next Door we're greeted by a more than packed bar and a Hostess that is more than a little confused or bitchy I'm too hungry to care. I ask about seating in the dining room and we're told the kitchen has closed for the night. I've heard rumor of Next Door doing this often lately so I'm not surprised, but still a little doubtful of the Hostesses ability to make the call. I smile and nod as we move past the host stand to the bar...I need a drink stat to deal with this craziness. The bar like the dining room is packed with patrons loving the new upscale spot gem on U street. C and I find a spot at the bar...I take it upon myself to start us off with two Vodka martinis. By the time I turn around C has already started a conversation with some Random, she takes her martini with excitement, while I give him a less than excited look and turn back around. My attention has switched to my phones I'm working on getting us a table and double checking the status of the kitchen. I find yes the tables are pretty full, but no the kitchen is not closed ::stupid hostess whore:: He asked us to wait ten minutes for the table to clear out, I agree...but inpatients is written all over my face, when is it not? Over my shoulder I hear C excuse my less than sweet demeanor with "Don't mind her, she's grumpy and hungry." No truer words have been said all night, C does at least understand that when I'm hungry that is it, I must be fed. He tries to engage me in the conversation, as if the look on my face doesn't tell him that I don't give a fuck. I decline and turn back to the bar, check my watch and notice ten minutes is about up and rescue is nowhere in sight. Quit play on one phone and I've got us new dinner reservations across town, play on the other phone and the driver is on his way. I down more than half of my martini and tell C to can the Random and finish her drink. She sees the look in my eyes and drinks without a question. I tell her we're leaving and after a short look of surprise she nods, as I take steps to leave he's there hands up to stop me from getting any farther.
"Table is ready!"he says.
I give him a 'You better not be bullshitting me look' and he gestures over my shoulder where a server is rapidly cleaning the table. I agree to sit and C is all too happy as she will get prime view of the kitchen, the better to eye up the Chef you see. We sit at a small two-top and do a full on sampler menu, started with
Rock's Signature Crab Cake
Vanilla Scented Sweet Potatoes (cause I love sweet potatoes)
Crispy Salmon
Roasted Rosemary Chicken
Ended with Coconut Cake

While the food was soul comforting, the company perfect, the service left more than something to be desired. I will put that on the year grace period, any new place has to get past the growing pains. With calls from the driver, we hug our goodbyes a little later than expected.
My phone is already filled with the text from our next location, my response 'C had to eat' ::that's right I blamed it on her, she's tipsy what does she know::

We've never been to Ibiza and now I can say for good reason. We are prompted to pay twenty at the door, but once I see my contact we're ushered in but not after being thoroughly search by a woman security guard that enjoyed it a little too much, we walk into a humid warehouse covered in carpet. The space is broken into a series of large rooms, each with a bar and different music genre. We coast through the main room and one through a series of halls find ourselves in a packed Latin music room, hard to walk kinda packed. A sudden understanding come over me of why we were frisked so thoroughly at the door, such an open space, so many people, one bad fight, one person with a knife, one person with a gun could go really bad really fast in here. We meet up with our group and are greeted with shots, just as quickly as we're being ushered into another room. An even larger room than the last two, there is a large dance floor in the middle, and a perimeter of tables some elevated on a step and some not. Two stories up Ibiza had flown in a great DJ mixing house music for us the rest of the night. We settle into our table and take turns dancing it up with a perfect group of gays we found. I turn to find C and see that she has been distracted by some guy and from where I stand I'm pretty sure one of the compliments was "You're soft like a stripper" What?! Really? I roll my eyes and focus my attention else where. Which just happens to be the part of our group that is so done, and I see this going down hill fast. Which means one thing, C and I have to leave before that happens which means now. I peel her suitor off of her and get our coats, we kiss our goodbyes to every ones drunken dismay and make our way outside.
Stepping into a very cool, rainy night...we catch eye contact while standing on the sidewalk and start laughing uncontrollably. We climb into the car, and get dropped off a few blocks from our cars...as we walk linked arm in arm she mentions Empanadas and I give her a look that clearly says 'I remember the last time we tried this one.' the compromise is stopping back at our second home for a quick pizza.
With full bellies, and cloudy minds we hug out our goodbyes and each walk that half block alone. That eerie hour in DC when you see people, but not a lot of people, the birds are chirping, but the street lamps are still glowing, most peaceful you'll see it, right before the start of a new day.
-n

Sex On Tap

Find a replacement? No way, too much work!

I am a big believer in not burning your bridges, even if it is a bad ending keep it civil because somewhere down the line 'that' person is going to be the person you need. As C and I navigate our way through the city I introduce her as my bestest best and everyone takes her as family. After a few martinis it's always the same story...We've known her forever, since she was a baby, before she was evil, wait she's always been evil. I laugh and take the teasing, but the truth is I'd have it no other way. Knowing people what they're about, what they bring to the table, what they bring as an up-side.

The 'up-side' is always something I look for but never a one way street, as much as someone can do for me I can do for them. But with all these connections, all these bridges there are lots of layers.

Many different levels of relationship are a part of every life, but what happens when sex is a part of many of those relationships? While many of the parts of the relationships have ended, the sex part of them stays, not only stays but is still active. With an understanding. I joke and tell people that the girls I know never have dry-spells and to a degree its true, when there is always someone to fit your fancy, what is stopping you?

Nothing. As I begin my survey on the subject, I find out that I am the only one who thinks nothing. Excuses roll in from all over the place, I call them excuses because the reasoning behind them was more of self preservation, then self gratification. Not that it's incorrect to want to self preserve, it's natural a protective action, you may not even know you're doing. The list starts with, Sounds nice, but in real life things like that don't work and moves into...

Feelings developing.

Feelings getting hurt.

Everyone not being understanding.

Lack of equal honesty.

Not everyone is ready for such things.

The only valuable point I got was personality, it does take a certain personality, but what doesnt. It takes a certain personality to own a dog. If all the above possible reasons are your personal reasons than you should stay in the safety zone. We'll come visit when bored out of our damn minds, but with sex on tap when would that happen? The ready are born ready.
What is the upside in all these layers? When there is so much at risk. Perhaps it's in the risk nothing is ever for certain, being able to have that connection with more than one person, could be special, could be meaningful in the moment, could be supportive when needed. Pass up all these possibilities, in exchange for what monogamy, safety, comfort, general do right, and because it's easy. Suppose easy is a relative statement, what comes to some may never even be seen by others, not even a glance.
I agree with another softer point brought up, having someone to come home to. But in a day and life filled with moments, it's fair enough to say pick the moments that are going to make you happy at that moment. Coming home to someone is just a moment like the others, holding no more value than the others.
Sex on tap, brings serious thoughts, about meaningful people, memorable moments.
-n