what would your ideal date be?

If it were a meal...Brunch, that's my favorite. Everything moves a little slower at brunch you don't have somewhere to be or things to do so you can just enjoy the time. If it were a place...Outdoors, I love being outside in the sun and fresh air. All together I like dates that 'melt' no questioning moments, awkward decisions or bad vibes. Just two good people having a good time with no expectations.

Ask me anything

If you had your ideal of ideals, at this point in life - where would you be and what would you be doing?

Here where I am working towards a dream I really love and believe in. Learning myself in true form...the only thing I can say is a bigger place for my spoiled pups.

Ask me anything

Why do you like to write?

Great way to get things out of your system, something you're feeling, something you're experiencing. The thought that others might find something in my writing and enjoy reading it is amazing.

Ask me anything

Pit Solo

A dark place never seen, yet listened to explicitly.  With just a twist the soul is plunged into the depths, nothing but the sound rushing over head.  Weight from the growth pulling...pushing...crushing.  Even as you keep the horizon in view loss of control eats what is left of sanity, taking your thoughts.  There is no need to grasp.  At anything.  This trip, this rush, this torture is for you alone, self induced, concern is pushed away.  Pulling from deep down, stifle with out a choice, suffocation threatens until survival kicks in and is held more sacred than the heart.

I lied through my teeth, fighting the feeling the crept up and seemed to cripple me.  Once welcome butterflies flew away and I was left with a knotting pain in the pit of my stomach.  Tears pushed at the rims of my lashes, all to maintain a feeling of false control, to avoid breaching anything we might not make it back from.  The sensation that came from the pit of my stomach was only second to that of my breaking heart, cracking in the way it so often does.  Always the same stress fractures waiting for just the right amount of pressure.  As you lay your head down with promises of sweet dreams, I plot on how to mend these few pieces with a sweet dream of my own in the back of my mind, that you might mend them for me.

-n

Photo courtesy of David Barber @odoketa; http://www.davidbarber.org/

Daily Combo

Dark blue with light blue dots

and

pink with green dogs

-n

Daily Combo

Black lace
and
Bright Red with White and Silver Stars

-n

Final Tone

"If there's love..."
Putting ourselves through nothing less than torture for an ending that is so un-certain, we dare not imagine what things could become. The promise of someday, down the line, in the future...are all reasons we hold on and put time into people who might not be the right person for you. Taking the needed chance on life and the people that are brought into it, the leap we're all afraid of but all want to take. As much as people tell themselves they don't want to loose control of their actions, broken down into pet names, farmers markets and the like. Women and men do want it...to care about someone so much you scream and cry.
To be cared about.
Simply being the priority or seemingly being the priority, settling for the forethought in someones mind. Begging for just a corner of their heart, a tiny part for you to claim your own for that tiny split second. Dreading the moment you feelings of utter contentment and destroyed into nothing less than a pile on the floor, the kind that you kick around the debris a little to see if there is anything worth salvaging.
Salvation.
Once you've come through a relationship and the key term being through, moving forward and starting something else. You may have fond feeling, you many have a grudge sitting between your shoulders, it may be that you picked up a little jaded chip. As you look forward to what is to come, it may not be a clear picture, you may not be able to see past the explosion of used tissues that surrounds you to know what you're looking for until the feeling come. Finding salvation in another, someone else who will love and care for you and your new scars. This person may be the one that looks past that jaded view you have on trust and future, the one to nurture you back to resemble whole. That person is simply the next.
Thoughts brought up by lyrics from a song heard in passing and now brings me back to a softer time.
"...I just want something to do with it."
All putting ourselves through the gambit of emotions just to be part of something, someone...love.

-n

Daily Combo

Silver with Blue crowns
And
Green with White polka dots
-n

Diva-tini

I'm running late and while this story may start like many others, it's definitely it's own unique adventure. I drive through the city rain sprinkling my windshield, coordinating the dream team. C and AA are the players tonight, I've got AA on the phone and I'm getting text from C all while putting out timing and locations...oh and driving pesky driving. AA is in need of serious motivation, after selecting her outfit via photographic memory and giving a good pep-talk she's on her way. C was already in the city so she is ready to p.a.r.t.y however the text I get from her tells me she is not in the 'kick ass' mind set I need from her. After I beep over to another line on the phone and say goodbye to AA I check the text from C.
"I'm here, but this place is packed."
When ever I'm the first there, I secure seats and have every ones drinks waiting for them. So my reply,
Better get some seats.
Simple and to the point. While I continue my conversation on the phone, I grumble something about seats. When asked to repeat I say 'She never gets seats, well I'm gonna scare some outta her.' Few moments later I'm downtown looking for parking, with my new little car I score a nice spot close to the meet. Convenient cause it's still sprinkling a little and I don't have an umbrella. I finish my phone call, make promises to bring the dream team around to visit a few mentioned venues.
I step out into a surprisingly cold night for as early in the season as it is, the rain promising to make my hair wild. A cute couple sits on a the stairs close to my car enjoying the rain from under their umbrella, I smile to myself as the scene brings me back to my own memories. Once inside the deep red velvet curtains are up, which tells me the cold seasons are upon us, rounding the corner and stripping off my scarf I realize it is indeed very busy. But to my delight C has successfully gotten us two seats up front and personal at the bar. I laugh as I glide into my seat and she looks immediately protective, as she assumes I'm some whore trying to steal the seat she has worked oh so hard for. She recognizes me and laughs with me as the comfort sinks back into her shoulders. "Good job." I tel her, she says back in her dramatic tone. "When I saw that text, I started pushing bitches off the bar!" I crack up laughing, which simultaneous announces my arrival, heads turn and I'm quickly served with my favorite sparkling shiraz...the night has officially begun. I relay to C the few stops we have to make and that we're waiting for AA as usual. Meeting and greeting, C and I make all kinds of new friends, some nice and some creepy. When out of no where a 'random' latches on to C, she is buzzed therefore amused, so the shots start and while I have no patience for him, a shot seems to hit my seat every time. By the time I'm able to guide AA, C and I are toastie, very-very toastie. AA arrives we do one last shot to get us through the walk down to Midtown and we're out the door.

The rain has eased up a little making it a much less pain filled walk. As we walk three in a row, a group of four in a row approaches. In passing my shoulder is clipped, being the irritable one of the bunch I would generally never let an opportunity like that go, but being pre-occupied on my phone I keep walking. AA notices and decides a comment is in need "Drunk bitches!" she screams down the sidewalk and at that moment all the background noise of the street dies out, so the comments targets hear it loud and clear. One girl twirls around with an always classy "I know you're not talking to us!" . That was all C and AA needed to dive in angry clawing fist first, I grab AA around the waist as she twirls past my side and effectively hold back the first wave of attacks, while clearly struggling in my four inch heels I see C go for the girls and the girls coming back towards us. All the while thinking to myself, this is how the night ends we're all going to jail, cause there is no way I'm letting these bitches get a heads up on us! Right where I'm still trying to stop AA a few bouncers in a nearby stoop notice my struggle, they hop up to stop C with the convincing line of "You're too pretty to fight, look at that cute face!" The hilarity in the line is enough to get the girls to settle, but they still want to fight. We keep walking, the trash talk continues...but all the same we're on our way again. As we walk I'm still on the phone and the only line that comes to mind is the one that I have to tweet out immediately
"My bitches were going to kick those bitches ass! There were going to fight for me!"
While there were a few more stops in the night, nothing can top that...so I save the rest for another time.

-n

Daily Combo

Dark Pink with Light Pink Dots

And

Royal Blue with Dark Blue Lace



-n

Confetti Covered Floor

Move into every relationship with an open mind. Each individual begins with the same level of adoration, respect and liking. So what changes? What makes someone a best friend and what makes someone a frienemy? Emotions. It's all that comes to mind.

I run the inquiry past a friend and the response is 'I keep people in tiers.' Tiers? The first thought that comes to mind is 'effort' it takes a lot to create a mental hierarchy, using precious energy and mental power. In everything a natural order works itself out, how often you see someone, how long you spend with them, how well you get along. Within a society that over-booking is normal, I'd like to think I can leave the people in my life to a 'honor system' so-to-speak.





I give freely - so take freely.
I give everything - what you need is here.
Loyalty always - come through when asked.
Trust all - think before you abuse it.




Completely possible that I give freely as a way to keep things easy and stress to a minimum. Habits developed as a result of wanting to keep the energy put in, to a minimum. Which takes me to a thought, possibly even a concern that, I am too realistic for my emotions. Looking at this situation I think to myself, Have I been too nice? Not in the 'someone has walked all over me' way, but closer to the 'you had a little too much slack and hung yourself' way. Appreciation is important, yet rarely brought up as a key point or need. For each aspect in a relationship, there should be appreciation right behind it to make that particular relationship unique and valuable.
Of course in life, not everyone has the same outlook and each person does not handle relationships with similar actions. Never expecting individuals to do what you might consider the 'right' thing. There will be always be a person who comes along and takes all the cookies out of the cookie jar, fucking it up the for the rest of us. Making that space a little harder to fill, a little more jaded for the next relationship. Each person has their own bottom line that needs to be taken into consideration. When all that lust filled confetti has fallen...after the newness has warn off...company alone no longer fills the need...are you in the red or black? What are you left with?

Blank shreds of colored paper surround a single silhouette. For better or worse...you will always have more to sprinkle your path.

-n

Skip a Beat

My Angel

She glides, with grace and style her own

She captivates and captures hearts, unknown

She loves and makes the world go round

Her beauty and laughter, world renowned

She makes your world a better place,

She puts the smile upon your face,

She makes my heart sing, and sets me free

My Angel truly means the world to me…

The author is not me. But I felt it was so worth sharing. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do if not more. Sometimes you just need a heartfelt moment...the kind that makes you skip a beat all together.

-n

Look Familiar

Hopefully not, cause if there are photos like that floating around I'd be a little worried! I get lots of questions as to why I keep anonymous and even more request for a pictures of myself. While any regular readers have seen snapshots of me here and there, this should answer any questions of what does that capitaln look like.

Courage for this photo goes to my bestie C she is there to support me in my craziest moments. Effort of the actual shoot and liquid courage goes to a couple of friends of mine, I thank them both for letting me run naky in their place and well making the Apple martins, cause I definitely needed them.

So I think that's all I can say about this photo besides, enjoy!

-n

Would be Conquest

A glint of pride as he talks of his wife. This man describes the last year of new joy from marriage.

A story I love. Happily Ever After. While I'm all too understanding in what life can throw at us. I still sit back and enjoy watching someone plan the day that will start the rest of their lives. For the duration of the marriage that is. Even in knowing something just won't last, I watch them enjoy the ride and detailed dance it takes to keep the show up.
Should there be a disclaimer 'Shelf life, not forever.'?

Overhear a sigh of content, as he tells his lunch date that he's changed so much...feels so whole. Can't wait to make things better, be better for her, their life and the children she wants to bring into the world. He catches my eye as that last bit is mentioned and lends me a smile of comradery, as if there is an understanding that I too want children ::mentally, throws self down stairs:: I continue to listen while I sip my latte, my lunch date is late and it works out because I would like to keep listening to see where this goes.

"So how is the sex. Ya, know...since you broke the seal and all." His friend ask with a little caution but the curiosity driving this line of question is not stopping him from getting an answer. I hold my latte to my lips as to not draw attention to myself, the man looks around as if he is about to open Pandora's Box. At least I hope that is what he is about to bring to the surface, his face is older than his age...you can tell he's been down many different paths, none of them leading him where he truly wants to be. But perhaps that is because he doesn't yet know where he wants to be or needs to be.
"I've tried everything." He finally says in almost a whisper. His friend doesn't quite know what it means, he starts with a smile "So she's into a little everything?" he prompts. My mind is working through the tone of the newlyweds comment about his wife, not a happy tone...more of a solace tone, what ever is about to come out is bad. Poof, goes 'Happily Ever After'.
The man looks at his friend with a look that I can only describe as pain, it seems his cup was filled to the rim and this line of questioning was just too much, he pours everything out in what seems like one breath. "It's been so long, we don't have sex, when we do I can never finish or even come close, she doesn't enjoy it, she still thinks sex is evil, how am I suppose to change years of suppression?!? We haven't talked about it in a long time, now that I've brought it up we fight all the time, I love her, but I don't know if this will be fixable, marriages end over less. I've started noticing other woman, I can't taste my food, all I want is to love my wife and feel it in return from her."
Silence for a long moment, it's clear his friend has nothing tangible to offer and with a subject so vast, where do you start? Finally with a humbled look his friend ask the only question he can, "What are you going to do?".

"Stay the course."

Nothing more. My mind is racing with objections, thoughts, scenarios, everything, but I stay silent ::cause, how rude would that be!:: Where do you draw the line? Cut your losses. Every situation is different, but the key is knowing and being comfortable with yourself. Without knowing your own limits you can't make the right decision. This guy knew himself pretty well but not well enough, there was a great deal of denial playing in this choice also. Everyday we're faced with decisions to make, some make them, some avoid, some regret and everyday I'm thankful that I know myself well enough to know what's best for me. That's all you can really aim for knowing what is best for you, not worrying about what anyone else is doing, because like you they will all make their own decisions, there is nothing you can do about it. What people may see as selfishness, I know is confidence. I'm confident enough to live by that view 'All you can control, is yourself'.
So in the instance that the part of your life you are unhappy with is controlled by someone else, when do you know to stay to course or cut your losses of a lost conquest.

-n

Daily Combo

pink with white polkadots
and
blue with dark blue stripes

-n

Wonder Woman meets Pole

I've wanted an image to go with the blog for a while. Often get questions of what I look like, so what better compromise than to put the two together! These are a pair of my favorite shoes ever. Hint; there isn't much more in involved in the photo. A friend said these shoes were a perfect cross of Wonder Woman meets a stripper pole.

What do you think?!?

-n

From Lynx to Minx

Really if we must be detailed 'Minxy Butt' is the term I've been donned. With laughter my close friends use variations of it...Minx, Minxy, Devil....all taken as terms of endearment...of course.
This is particularly funny because when I was asked what big cat would I be, my answer was a Lynx for sure! Extremely good hearing; check. Usually solitary; check. Although small groups of lynx may travel and hunt together occasionally, I have been known to play well with other on occasion. Stab deeply into their prey; check. Really, who doesn't?

You take those attributes, add my smile and you get the 'she's cooking something up' look. When that smile comes out you can often overhear C say 'I can see the wheels turning, am I gonna end up on a pole?' As true as that statement is sometimes, it's always fun to see reaction when I lay out the crazy plan for the night. Even if the plan has trouble written all over the girls are always up for the ride. Think it goes along the lines of 'You only live once' a little trouble goes a long way for great memories.

Daily Combo

black lace
and
blue with heart shaped earth

-n

Daily Combo

Blue with Dark blue stars
and
Green with print
'Wish Granted'

-n

Daily Combo

Nice new way to get daily blogs out!
My daily combo, even updated with changes in the middle of the day.
Think it'll become a great addition to the blog and that you all might come to enjoy it!
I know you think it's a little strange, but it's something that changes daily so why not blog it?!? Let me know what you think or if you have suggestions. Otherwise, get ready for a little daily dose lovebugs!

Black with pink crowns
and
Pink with green dogs

-n

Garter Snake

Lacy, perfectly innocent - in just the worst way.

-n

Little Black Dress

Truth be told I've got lots of them, but I wear them all the time! There is never an event that a little black dress doesn't have a place. This one...probably my shortest, which works out well for the stems!

Thanks to everyone who helped me decide last night...my twitter fashion consultants, its like having my very own 'glam squad'.

-n

Fluffy Pink Flowers

While walking the pups I caught the perfect breeze carrying the perfect sent. Feather light flowers, were drifting to the ground in front of me. I looked up and noticed they were floating all around me. The scent was so sweet, it brought all kinds of nice thoughts.

The first to pop into my mind, I would love to line a driveway with these trees one day. It would be such a nice welcome, to come home to everyday. I smile to myself because that 'one day' is so far away, by choice. Right now, I admit it's all about me and while I have visions on a driveway and cute house, they are distant visions.

After taking a snapshot and sending the picture to twitter I find out that the name of my tree is a Mimosa tree. Later that day at lunch I mention the tree to a friend, even explain that one day I want a driveway lined with these trees. The conversation was clearly just to fill space and had no meaning behind it. In fact I forgotten all about it, when the friend had asked me a week later what tree I was gushing over. When said I couldn't remember the name, the answer that I got back could not have been more perfect.

"Well I guess it doesn't matter, if you're going to buy someone you care about a tree might as well buy the whole forest and make sure you get a couple of the right ones."

The statement brought a smile to my face. Why stop at a tree, when you can give the whole forest. Now that is the way to love someone, never stop at just enough, when you can strive for dreams.

-n

This Skin

Naked. Sitting on my bed. The stress settles onto my shoulders a familiar resting place. Weary from the journey, the fight, the so far.

I laid out with the girls today, we spoke casually of what was to come. Baby, marriage, relocation, life in general was happening at lightening speed around us. While I play pro-bono shrink, I don't have much to comment on for myself. Nothing has made it to the surface yet, though in my mind thoughts are moving at light speed. An idea presents itself, I analyze, make sense of, absorb and file away. I've been doing a lot of filing away since.
A re-birth if you will, while I continue my solid exterior I stay uncertain with my soul. Afraid to take the first steps. Frozen. Disappointment flashes through my mind, how can I be frozen. The thought of lack of movement and even questioning myself stifles me.
I retreat, within myself. Gather up what I hold dear and try to keep it a float.

Naked, clueless, and drinking milk, like the day I was born.
Except now I don't cry when I'm spanked. My milk comes over ice with vodka and Kahlua. I don't get sent to the corner for biting. Rolling on the floor with the dogs is encouraged. Oh, and no bed time.

-n

Two Thousand Nine

Imagine my surprise when a new follower tweets me up with news that they have just been the 2009 visitor to my blog! Honestly the counter is at the bottom and I hadn't glanced at it in a while, so not only was I surprised but a little taken aback. While I love my readers, I never really think about how many people visit and get a peek into me. With so much help from twitter my blog has been shared with many.
As I contemplated the tweet, I thought instead of writing about myself...why not write about my reader. I sent a small off-the-cuff questionnaire to @kenop and this is what I discovered.

I thought to start him off easy and ask some easy questions, but when I sat down to right nothing but real questions made it to the list. If I was going to be able to write about someone, I need the real part of them to make the post so I went with it.

In love for over seven years, in a reality that is wonderful and terrifying all in the same moment. A strong business drive at heart, just aching to find that perfect platform. Will do what needs to be done, for the better of everything. Leans towards the spicy, aromatic and bold...when hungry that is. Enjoys the one-way stalking that twitter provides. Both admires and sees his father with a cape. By far my favorite set, was not so much a well explained answer but more of the unedited thoughtful answer.

- Sum up the last five years in five words.

Whirlwind. Wonderful. Responsibilities. Growth. Honesty.

In knowing that a large population of my readers are great, I'd like to introduce you all to another great person. Thank you for visiting, reading, commenting, it makes writing exciting again for me.

-n

One Mans Spoils are Another Womans Gains

I've gotten many questions as to why I have an attraction to the Spy Master game, which is a little surprising. To me it's a no-brainer, while real life spies are apart of my daily life; the whole secretive and killing side to it has been romanticized so well by Hollywood what's not to love?! Really it is kind of a turn on! Think, Mr and Mrs Smith...that was a hot movie.

Drum Roll Please...

Thanks for all the helpful comments!
Going with the Light Silver, which works out perfectly since it's partially the theme of the party.
Next decisions include, what shoes, hairstyle, and jewelry....but each of those are hardly worth their own entries so you'll just have to catch pics on twitter as I put it all together. Having the dress makes it officially birthday season, so I'm excited. Oh and nail color, have to pic that out too.

Thanks again for playing along, I'll post birthday pics and of course I'll be tweeting the night away!

The Great Debate

We start the birthday season off with a rather important decision.
What dress to wear?
It's the dress, the one that will be in all the pics, the on that everyone will comment on, the one that once I pick it out - all of my girlfriends will base their choices off...for this year at least. Sound crazy? It is. Woman are crazy yes, but we are a separate breed of runs-on-coffee-eastcoast-stressed-crazy. What may be even scarier is that we wear it proudly.

About three months in advance people start asking what I'm planning for my party, while I don't celebrate anything much during the year my birthday is IT. The big event, requires serious planning, serious self preparation, serious drinking and above all serious dancing is a must!
The rough-draft plan this year?
Small group of my best girls out on a boat all day for a little sun bathing and tubing action. While the guys check us into the hotel, and get our bags moved ::yes, we're spoiled:: We're dropped off from the boat right next to our hotel. Change and meet up with a slightly larger group of my besties for a casual dinner. We all move to a small lounge I've picked, this year the expected guests list will fill a large portion of the lounge. Which I love, every where you turn you know someone, that is fun to me.
Bringing me to the next component of the night...a dress.
Past years it has been easy to pick my dress, this year it's gotten a little harder. I've already tried on more than a few dresses and have narrowed it down to two. With a side note that I have one more store I need to visit. My girlfriends are split down the middle which is really strange, but none of them will go shopping until I pick a dress. I know, I know ...we're crazy.
There are all kinds of other things I could go on about, but I'll get to the point of this post.
Help me decide! Vote at the poll or send pics of another dress you think would be worthy!
-n

Sucker for a Sunset

It makes sense, I think to myself...I've always like sunsets better than sunrises. But I don't give him this explanation, instead I leave him to wonder what the hell I mean. The rumor about me liking to torture...it's a little true ::at least I'm honest:: I can't help myself really...and anyways I'll be the first to tell you, I'm not nice.
"What did you say?"
Well the words just kinda slipped.
"What words?" She says to me with an all too serious look.
Not those words, crazy!
"Oh, then why are you so concerned?"
I'm not. You are.

I didn't miss him, I didn't think much on him while he was gone, but when I saw him the word just kind came out. I could have stopped them but I wanted to see what would happen.

I like you like sunsets.

Even not knowing what it meant, he looked at me and smiled. Held me close and looked deep into my eyes. The only thought I had in the moment, was please don't respond with the dreaded three words. Cause if that happens, you've never seen a girl get dressed and in the car so fast.

"Why? I thought you liked him."
This particular friend is completely not understanding in instances like this, her nightly dream and life goal is to be loved, taken care of, barefoot and pregnant. A thought that brings the word 'vomit' to mind for me. But I love her point of view on my life, how crazy she thinks I am for wanting and needing things completely simple.

I do like him.
"And?"
And nothing else, I like him we have fun, and while it stays just so, I will keep him.
"You are so strange!"
I know.

Could be the colors, I do love color. But then again it could be the way he touches my face, the same way a sunset warms then cools the skin every night. Perhaps is the ever change that surrounds him, no two sunsets are the same.
What I find myself looking forward to the most about sunsets is that there will be another great one tomorrow.
-n

Microwave type Warmth

A warmth...
An emotion...
That starts deep within and warms you heart, moves your soul...
Right down to your little toes...
Wandering through the day cold, one word whispered...
You become a white hot flame in the dark...
Holding on so tight...
An explosion waiting to happen...

-n

Fog

As he hugs me close, kisses me deeply, and tells me he loves me. I warn, I'm not nice.

"Angel you are all sweet to me."

It's fine that you think that, but one day when I'm mean and I've hurt you don't be surprised. When I'm in the midst of an evil streak you have never seen such a calm state, I'm comfortable there. Inducing pain on people that may have done the same to me or may not even see it coming. With out a blink I will slap you in the face with the things no one should, rather no one dare bring up. Because the hurt from them will be to much, long lasting, and unforgivable. He looks down at me as he holds my face in his hands.

"Why are you saying these things Baby?"

Because one day, you'll see that calm come over me, eerie like a fog. The air will change and that will be because you're about to witness something that I don't bother hiding. And while it may not be directed at you, you will never look at me the same. Possibly never even love me the same again.

"Then baby, I'm willing to take that chance."

Your risk does not prove your love to me, as I'm not looking for proof. Before you build an idea of me and put it on that pretty little pedestal, know that I do not want to be up there.
While the sting is for a moment, occasionally the fall back into the fog is a memorable pain.

-n

Big Girl Boots

We're squeezed into an over crowded bar, dead center with people packed in like ground meat in a casing all around us. Our group has taken up a fair share of the bar, so in my efforts to get a drink, I have to alternate with hugs and kiss hellos. Oh and it's hot as hell, if hell was sitting in the kitchen with my mother as she attempted to cook.

Good thing I'm not wearing much! We get to the bar where a branch of our group has secured a window, currently they are ordering shots of Grand Manier ::burns so good:: A couple of guys eye us up and hand us shots.

"Don't waste these."
I'm pretty sure I'll be able to handle it, a smirk reaches the corner of my lips.

We take the shots, that were really like double shots, without even a little wince. The original guy looks to me and says

"Whoa! You took that like a big girl"
Uh huh.
I narrow my eyes at him to gauge his doubt, while he sizes me up. My outfit tonight is pretty casual, layered tank tops, (Black and White) black tights and black knee high boots. His eyes get to my boots and widen...

"No wonder! Look at those boots!"
Yup, my big girl boots.
"Damn! Just tell me what's the cut and color you want?"

C and I catch eyes across the crowded bar, both knowing it's time to move on. This is our second stop of the night, we started at Mate in Georgetown for Organic Cucumber Mojitos in honor of Earth Hour. This small bar appearance was for a birthday, moving across town to see another birthday girl, this particular party is a green party. Finally making our way out of the bar, we run into more friends outside, I give them a outline of the night ahead and we hop into the car.

We arrive at Senso, Senso...not my fav place on 18th street. It always has the strangest smell...like day old-dirty recliner-sex ::come on, you know the smell:: As we walk through the door my eyes go to the back balcony, of which I see the girls dangling from. We make our way through another crowded room and climb the stairs into a very warm loft, filled with girls in green, a couple large fans, a small bar with the worlds slowest bartender...ever. As this is our third stop of the night we jump right in to the dance party. Round of birthday shot, a few photo ops, and a we're putting our jackets on again. This time the expected right up the street party has moved a few blocks away.
Once outside we're trying to map out the best way to pick up a couple more girls and make it to the next stop in a timely manner. All this planning is broken up when I here my name being screamed across six lanes of traffic. Followed by a flurry of text, friends at a club across the street are outside and want in. I make a mad dash, while sending my text , by the time I get across the street, they are being ushered inside and geared up with bracelets. I'm tempted to come in for a quick drink and say hi, but we've got a tight schedule as it is. Just when I'm hugging hellos, the car pulls up friends already inside and we're off the 14th street.
We make it to The Park and the party is in full force by this point the birthday boy is dancing all over the place, pouring Champagne on everyone and buying round after round of shots. I've danced so much tonight, there is no need for exercise for another couple of days! But I find myself and C three drinks in and dancing our asses off! Per our usual I'm fighting guys off of her and telling them that she is my bitch, we laugh as the walk away utterly confused wondering if we really are lesbians ::ftr I like boys::
The DJ plays every song I love, so I've just got no other option than to dance until my legs are jelly. We're laughing at how tired we are by the end of the night and amazed that we are still able to have a conversation after the night we'd just had.
Our night ends like so many good one, C and I are walking down the sidewalk linked arm in arm, laughing uncontrollably. We're also content. That alone makes the night, to see all these people, go so many places and be utterly content at the end of the night.
I love this city.
-n

Grande Tree with No Foam

I stand in my Starbucks behind a gentleman, late fifties to early sixties. He orders his hot beverage with room. As he waits, he picks up a travel mug, it is green with writing all over it. He angles it towards the cashier and says
'Whats all this nonsense on here?'
She replies, That is 'Green' travel mug, the writing is telling you how much recyclable material was used to make it.
'Why would you walk around with all this on your cup?'
His voice has raised a little, he puts the cup down, shakes his head and looks to me as I step up to order my drink. Before the words leave my mouth the cashier recognizes me and fills in the order for me, then she reaches out her hand. I hand her my travel mug, the very green, very re-usable, the very same mug the gentleman had just had in his hand.
I look him in the eyes and saw an internal struggle of what to say, stick to his point or not. Nothing came out of his mouth, so I offered
I proudly walk around with this cup, I have the whole set, and I tell everyone who ask me about it. I also save ten cents every time I bring my cup with me and the cost of paper cup, paper holder, plastic top.
Do you have grandchildren?
'Yes, of course.' Slight defense in his voice now.
Do you want their grandchildren to have trees? Because while you've grown up with trees and your children have, there are children who might not if we continue on this path.
We're not hippies, or tree huggers, we're all trying to do our little part to conserve. That's all.
The attention of the line is on us both now, and I don't mind nor do I feel bad for this old soul. He looks to me, nods his head and says
' Maybe I'll bring in my black mug.'
With that he turns and walks away, I pay the cashier and move to the waiting area. While he puts cream and sugar in his coffee, I take the opportunity to tell the barista all about my sat night plans for Earth Hour. She is excited and tells me she wants to join and I give her the web address, I think he listened in as well.
Earth Hour is a great cause, but really it's about conservation all the time, every little bit helps.
So turn off your lights this Saturday from 8:30 - 9:30pm, I'm sure you can figure out something to do with an hour of darkness. I've gotten business all around the DC are to offer support, let's do this together. I'll be drinking organic martinis if you were wondering!
-n

Comfort Found Next Door

'Don't mind her, she's grumpy'.

I'm running late, I hate running late. My last tweet for the night says it all 'grumpy and hungry'. The nights plan is to pickup C after she has a drink with the sinnersaint, he is my male counter part. C will go through two levels of checks and balances mainly he and I. While he means well and tries to be nice ::don't we all:: he is really bad, not in the worst way, but bad enough...thus the sinnersaint is born. She calls with an update on my way, you almost ready? I lie, uhhuh picking out my outfit now. My hair is soaking wet and I don't have a lick of an idea what I'm going to wear. Going with curly hair tonight so that is not a biggie, an outfit...something that everyone will see, remember and talk about behind my back. No pressure at all, guys have no idea how lucky they are, jeans and button-down...spoiled is what. As per my usual my outfits start with the shoes, tonight I choose Patent Grey, Black piping and Black stiletto. The outfit black on black, short skirt of offset the long legs, backless blouse ::yes, backless is a fav of mine::
Jewelry on, quick spritz of 'lure them in' and I'm out the door. Twenty minutes after I told C that I was twenty minutes away. Luckily when I call her she is still looking for parking, I give a dramatic huff and tell her I am looking as well, even though I am still clearly on the highway. She calls when she finds parking and ask if she should wait for me, I tell her to go on in...as I'm still blocks away.
A shot later I meet C inside our second home, we call it that cause everyone there is like family, dis functional and we wish it was home cause the booze is always flowing. Also, who doesn't like walking into a place where when there are no seats, they make them appear for us. She is laughing and flirting as I walk in, I'm handed a shot and it's followed up with a glass of wine. As I look around the place is packed. Too packed to be able to get something to eat, and I've yet to eat today. Before the drinking rolls into full force I decide we need to eat, also I can feel myself getting grumpy. While I'm generally a perky little thing, you catch me with an empty stomach and I'll rip yours out. So I suggest we move to another venue, the move is prompted by a text that promises good dinner.
As we walk through the doors of Next Door we're greeted by a more than packed bar and a Hostess that is more than a little confused or bitchy I'm too hungry to care. I ask about seating in the dining room and we're told the kitchen has closed for the night. I've heard rumor of Next Door doing this often lately so I'm not surprised, but still a little doubtful of the Hostesses ability to make the call. I smile and nod as we move past the host stand to the bar...I need a drink stat to deal with this craziness. The bar like the dining room is packed with patrons loving the new upscale spot gem on U street. C and I find a spot at the bar...I take it upon myself to start us off with two Vodka martinis. By the time I turn around C has already started a conversation with some Random, she takes her martini with excitement, while I give him a less than excited look and turn back around. My attention has switched to my phones I'm working on getting us a table and double checking the status of the kitchen. I find yes the tables are pretty full, but no the kitchen is not closed ::stupid hostess whore:: He asked us to wait ten minutes for the table to clear out, I agree...but inpatients is written all over my face, when is it not? Over my shoulder I hear C excuse my less than sweet demeanor with "Don't mind her, she's grumpy and hungry." No truer words have been said all night, C does at least understand that when I'm hungry that is it, I must be fed. He tries to engage me in the conversation, as if the look on my face doesn't tell him that I don't give a fuck. I decline and turn back to the bar, check my watch and notice ten minutes is about up and rescue is nowhere in sight. Quit play on one phone and I've got us new dinner reservations across town, play on the other phone and the driver is on his way. I down more than half of my martini and tell C to can the Random and finish her drink. She sees the look in my eyes and drinks without a question. I tell her we're leaving and after a short look of surprise she nods, as I take steps to leave he's there hands up to stop me from getting any farther.
"Table is ready!"he says.
I give him a 'You better not be bullshitting me look' and he gestures over my shoulder where a server is rapidly cleaning the table. I agree to sit and C is all too happy as she will get prime view of the kitchen, the better to eye up the Chef you see. We sit at a small two-top and do a full on sampler menu, started with
Rock's Signature Crab Cake
Vanilla Scented Sweet Potatoes (cause I love sweet potatoes)
Crispy Salmon
Roasted Rosemary Chicken
Ended with Coconut Cake

While the food was soul comforting, the company perfect, the service left more than something to be desired. I will put that on the year grace period, any new place has to get past the growing pains. With calls from the driver, we hug our goodbyes a little later than expected.
My phone is already filled with the text from our next location, my response 'C had to eat' ::that's right I blamed it on her, she's tipsy what does she know::

We've never been to Ibiza and now I can say for good reason. We are prompted to pay twenty at the door, but once I see my contact we're ushered in but not after being thoroughly search by a woman security guard that enjoyed it a little too much, we walk into a humid warehouse covered in carpet. The space is broken into a series of large rooms, each with a bar and different music genre. We coast through the main room and one through a series of halls find ourselves in a packed Latin music room, hard to walk kinda packed. A sudden understanding come over me of why we were frisked so thoroughly at the door, such an open space, so many people, one bad fight, one person with a knife, one person with a gun could go really bad really fast in here. We meet up with our group and are greeted with shots, just as quickly as we're being ushered into another room. An even larger room than the last two, there is a large dance floor in the middle, and a perimeter of tables some elevated on a step and some not. Two stories up Ibiza had flown in a great DJ mixing house music for us the rest of the night. We settle into our table and take turns dancing it up with a perfect group of gays we found. I turn to find C and see that she has been distracted by some guy and from where I stand I'm pretty sure one of the compliments was "You're soft like a stripper" What?! Really? I roll my eyes and focus my attention else where. Which just happens to be the part of our group that is so done, and I see this going down hill fast. Which means one thing, C and I have to leave before that happens which means now. I peel her suitor off of her and get our coats, we kiss our goodbyes to every ones drunken dismay and make our way outside.
Stepping into a very cool, rainy night...we catch eye contact while standing on the sidewalk and start laughing uncontrollably. We climb into the car, and get dropped off a few blocks from our cars...as we walk linked arm in arm she mentions Empanadas and I give her a look that clearly says 'I remember the last time we tried this one.' the compromise is stopping back at our second home for a quick pizza.
With full bellies, and cloudy minds we hug out our goodbyes and each walk that half block alone. That eerie hour in DC when you see people, but not a lot of people, the birds are chirping, but the street lamps are still glowing, most peaceful you'll see it, right before the start of a new day.
-n

Sex On Tap

Find a replacement? No way, too much work!

I am a big believer in not burning your bridges, even if it is a bad ending keep it civil because somewhere down the line 'that' person is going to be the person you need. As C and I navigate our way through the city I introduce her as my bestest best and everyone takes her as family. After a few martinis it's always the same story...We've known her forever, since she was a baby, before she was evil, wait she's always been evil. I laugh and take the teasing, but the truth is I'd have it no other way. Knowing people what they're about, what they bring to the table, what they bring as an up-side.

The 'up-side' is always something I look for but never a one way street, as much as someone can do for me I can do for them. But with all these connections, all these bridges there are lots of layers.

Many different levels of relationship are a part of every life, but what happens when sex is a part of many of those relationships? While many of the parts of the relationships have ended, the sex part of them stays, not only stays but is still active. With an understanding. I joke and tell people that the girls I know never have dry-spells and to a degree its true, when there is always someone to fit your fancy, what is stopping you?

Nothing. As I begin my survey on the subject, I find out that I am the only one who thinks nothing. Excuses roll in from all over the place, I call them excuses because the reasoning behind them was more of self preservation, then self gratification. Not that it's incorrect to want to self preserve, it's natural a protective action, you may not even know you're doing. The list starts with, Sounds nice, but in real life things like that don't work and moves into...

Feelings developing.

Feelings getting hurt.

Everyone not being understanding.

Lack of equal honesty.

Not everyone is ready for such things.

The only valuable point I got was personality, it does take a certain personality, but what doesnt. It takes a certain personality to own a dog. If all the above possible reasons are your personal reasons than you should stay in the safety zone. We'll come visit when bored out of our damn minds, but with sex on tap when would that happen? The ready are born ready.
What is the upside in all these layers? When there is so much at risk. Perhaps it's in the risk nothing is ever for certain, being able to have that connection with more than one person, could be special, could be meaningful in the moment, could be supportive when needed. Pass up all these possibilities, in exchange for what monogamy, safety, comfort, general do right, and because it's easy. Suppose easy is a relative statement, what comes to some may never even be seen by others, not even a glance.
I agree with another softer point brought up, having someone to come home to. But in a day and life filled with moments, it's fair enough to say pick the moments that are going to make you happy at that moment. Coming home to someone is just a moment like the others, holding no more value than the others.
Sex on tap, brings serious thoughts, about meaningful people, memorable moments.
-n

Dynamite Spot

When I hear stories of people being caught...doing something they shouldn't be or more so something they're not expected to be doing. It always sends me into a self-check of sorts, what am I doing, could it be questioned, and should it be questioned? If I'm okay with it does it matter what others may think? On the other hand, if it troubles those few I hold dear should I be concerned?

On more than one occasion, more than one friend of mine has dated more that one person at once. Some date everyone seriously and some date casually, if that makes a difference. Once upon a time I would be stricken with disapproval, but now I like to live and let live. If you're not hurting anyone right, with little comfort in the lack of truth in that statement I was brought to a new mental horizon. Because someone always gets hurt, it may not be a lasting hurt or a serious one, still the pain is there. So my new outlook became 'worry is waste', no reason to worry about what other people are doing and what might happen, just live and make yourself happy in each moment. So in never judging friends I become the default go to for advice or just a good old moral check ::the latter doesn't happen very often:: Guys and Girls alike come to weigh the possibilities of their situations...what if...maybe one day...the list goes on and on.

Every once and a while you get the friend who has been flowing too smoothly for a little too long, which equals one thing. Mass Destruction. There is no burn control even possible in these situations, it is full on wildfire. In the form of five girls all finding out about each other at once, and unfortunately for this friend his type just happens to be crazy, so five crazy woman all finding out about each other. Quite the show as you can imagine, but what I always find is the better show is the way there person tries to get out of 'trouble'.

I'm sit starving waiting to eat at a favorite sushi place, an agitated friend comes through the door and flops into the seat across from me, he has called an emergency lunch. I ask if he knows what he would like to eat, knowing that he has no appetite. My hot tea comes and as I hold the warm glass between my hands and sip, I'm interrupted by a large sigh. I generally never ask the questions until the topic has been opened, I had my ideas of what had happened but in this case he would have to spill. I make eye contact from over the rim of my cup, one eyebrow raised and he starts.

'I took a shower'

You took a shower?

'That is how this all happened!'

Of course, damn shower always screws my sh*t up.

'I got in the shower and left my phone out.'

Ooooooooh, ouch.

'I never leave my phone and of course the moment I do, She text me.'

Who?

'The ex.'

What are the odds...

'It didn't say anything bad, but it was almost midnight.'

So what did she say?

'Nothing.'

How do you know she saw it?

'I got out of the shower and saw the text, saw that it was marked read. She hadn't said anything to me so why would I bring it up. The next day Charlie called me furious.'

Charlie? The work ass?

'Turns out that she just saved all the numbers of the girls I call the most.'

Wait, wait you don't clear your history?! Oh, you deserve this! hahaha

'She called the ex and told her that I cheated on her for the last year of the relationship.'

Whuh?!

'She called Charlie and told her she was an office slut, Charlie ran to find comfort in Jen.

The other office ass?! Oh man.

'Jen freaked, while she was okay with Laura the girl on our softball team, someone else in our office was just too much.
Oh I agree, hahahaha.

'I went to softball because I never thought Jen would really say anything, Laura nailed me right in the back with a softball...hard!'

I'd be a little scared of her too.

'What the hell? How did this happen?!? My whole spot has been blown up!

Hm.

I take a thoughtful moment, who do you like out of the group? He gives me a look that says he doesn't want to give any of them up. So my answer. The don't. He looks at me like I've lost it along with the rest of them. I suggest taking it down to three, but if you really want to keep them all, show each that they still have your full attention. This is about attention, if they had no idea before you had more than one going, then just make them see that it's the same now. The only one that's gonna be trouble is the one who wants to be your girlfriend, the 'match' in this situation. You've got to tell her something else. Be honest to all others and don't tell crazy anything more than what she needs to know. Frankly I think that is the one you should get rid of. 'But she cooks.' Great reason, makes so much more sense now, you're an idiot!

The plan is formulated and the next steps are put into action. First I show up with him to company events, this shows the girls that there is no way he can be all bad, to hold a girl as a friend. Being a pretty friend makes them want to get his attention back ::two down::

Softball was particularly easy, I just happened to know that her boyfriend was not faithful last week, so what better way to get her back than an angry revenge bang ::two to go::

The ex, this was a little more specific, we would need to convince her over drinks that the girl who called her was a border line stalker that stole his phone. Why he still bangs her, I'll never understand ::one more down, one to go::

While out for drinks I convince him that this one is soo not worth all the work he'd have to put in, he begins to see my point. When a tap on my shoulder makes him turn white as snow. I turn to face a very angry 'crazy match' she ask me how I can still be friends with him after what he's done and if I knew all about these woman why I would let it go on.

My first thought is defensive, I didn't let him do anything. Until a thought comes to me, I turn sympathetic eyes to her. He told me all about the mis-understanding, all he's been able to talk about is how much he misses you. I'm the one who suggested he call all those girls, to break it off. This way anything he wanted with you could really work out, I would never have thought all this would happen. Where I am not a touchy person when it comes to people outside of my circle, I need to seal-this-deal. I stand and give her a tight hug, and continue with I love you two together, he is so lucky. I've got to run why don't you finish my martini, it's one of your favorites?

Shock, followed by something similar to triumph cross her face. I think to myself, does she really think she has won out against me?! Please:: She sits, places a hand on his shoulder and looks into his eyes for a moment. I turn to say goodbye to him, he smiles and says 'You are insane.'

-n

Layin It Down: First

First

Pronunciation: \ˈfərst\

Function: adjective
: preceding all others in time, order, or importance: a: having the highest or most prominent part among a group of similar voices or instruments

Growing up, I always was that girl who had a boyfriend. Hell, I remember my very first Mickey Mouse chain from Vernon in the 6th grade. Yes, I loved me some Vernon. Oh wait….maybe it was just the shiny gold chain that I loved. Well regardless, I had a good boyfriend, a boyfriend who treated me like his Minnie…his number no. one Bitch. All the other knobby knee girls would stand in the lunch line wondering why the boys never gave them a chain or their chocolate milk. “What does she have that we don’t have?!” Don’t worry ya’ll, I wasn’t giving up my “cookies” at that tender young age. I was just a down chick. I could hang with the boys yet still be a sweet girl. Plus I was simply fly…the complete package.

Things didn’t change much through the years. There were just a few guys for me in high school because I embraced the security of a long term relationship, even then. Wherever there was C….there was her main man, and I was his main girl. I always wore his jersey jacket, drove his car, got the respect from his knuckleheaded friends that rolled in his crew, and I loved the Queen status. Time to break up? No problem. There was another fine guy out there who wanted a no. one Bitch. And if you were worthy, I was happy to fill the spot.

In life, as we mature and experience different successes and obstacles, relationships grow or fade. You take the lessons and keep it moving, if you’re smart. Sometimes, keeping it moving means taking a pause from the relationship dance to just stop and breathe. This has actually been a rare time in my life, because I’ve been taking that pause for just a bit, embracing my single status. This has been growing time…C time.

Ha Ha…Yeah Right. This is not a Dr. Phil entry. I was simply tired of being in the same shit. So, I decided to play a little, have some much needed fun and excitement.

With that said, I was recently seduced by my physical trainer and actively began screwing him, knowing he still had a girlfriend. I know this is a popular scenario, but quite new to me. I knew him from high school. And he was just one of those guys who wanted to give me his chocolate milk, but instead watched me be someone else’s no. one Bitch. Well, he was looking so very delicious 15 years later that I had to allow him a taste of what he’s been missing. But something wasn’t right. I was getting the attention but not the way I wanted. I began having therapeutic conversations with N and S, dishing out my complaints. S, the witty realist, was trying to remind me that it was hard to be his no. two Bitch, when I didn’t have a no. two myself. It was an unbalanced situation. This was making some serious sense to me. So, if I have a no. two, I am not so dependent on the sexy trainer to give me what I need. Well, that still wasn’t good. I was frustrated. Why am I getting some half ass shit from this dude? And then N, in her usual one statement brilliance, simply said, “C, you are not a no. two Bitch. You are a no. one Bitch, and you can’t do anything with a man who doesn’t treat you like one.”

** Side Note: To be treated like a no. one Bitch simply means you are priority no. one to your suitor. Doesn’t necessarily mean you are the only one, and quite frankly, who cares. Cause really, is he your only one? But when it comes down to your needs vs. the needs of the other bitches, you come first. For example, if your car breaks down and the other bitch wants sex, his ass comes to your rescue with some Triple A type service. That other bitch needs to wait. **

N was so right! It was like a light bulb getting turned on in a dark ass closet! Lesson Learned: I always need to be the # 1 Bitch, no matter what ranking I have a man in. That is just my natural status in the game, regardless of me being in a secure stable relationship or just playing the field. Self-Discovery is priceless!

I also realized that Sexy Trainer wasn’t even worthy of being my no. one Bitch...he was definitely no. two or three status…so it really wasn’t even.

So when Sexy Trainer decided to call me after several weeks of me kicking him to the curb, you can only imagine how surprised I was. “Hey Girl, what’s up?” “Not much, just coming home from a long weekend”. ”Oh yeah, well I had a horrible day”, he says. “I just had to spend $1500 on my BMW, 4 new tires and an alignment.” I respond thinking his car is definitely on no. one Bitch status, but say instead, “Oh that’s messed up”. A short pause before he abruptly demands, “So why don’t you come over here and fuck the shit out of me so I can relieve some stress before I get on the road to go back home?”.

I’m sorry; I am not your phone-a-ho. Why don’t you go call your no. three Bitch to take care of you!” Can you believe that pompous dude?! “Yes”, S says. “I mean, wasn’t it just a month ago when you dialed him up in between DC appointments to ask him how many times he thought he could make you come in 20 minutes?” “Oh Damn, I forgot about that.” That was a good as line though. Ok, S was right…but did he really mind? Let’s remember, I’m the no. one Bitch, not him.
-spicy

Ever Hunter

Seeing something.
Perhaps someone.
Sizing them up.
Deciding you want it.
Pursuing.
Taking in all forms possible.
Stopping only with surrender.
With a final pause of triumph.
Glimpse to the side.
Take steps of new interest.

Go on...you know you want to.

No one wants to be told they can't make themselves happy, which is how I took the term at first. Thoughts quickly filtered into maybe I just know exactly what makes me happy, and that is the actual 'hunt'. As I sit drinking my latte in the perfect window seat, I'm able to see lots of people, all different, all approaching things from a different view. Hunters and Gatherers...Lions and Lambs...Wanters and Givers. Definitely a hunter, and last time I check that is not a bad thing.
Why settle for what comes your way, in any instance? On that note, why would you let someone make you think that 'they' are as good as it gets?! I have a friend who likes to say 'Girls are always looking to trade up'. Of course we are! We're f*ing smart. Yes, there will be a time, when every woman decides this is 'the' man. But until then, nothing and I mean nothing is holding us back, shocked? ::maybe for good reason, I mean it in the worst of ways::
Before my male readers think they are getting away with something, you are just as guilty as us. Mentally I would say you guys have the same thoughts all the time, it's the actual act that separates. Men are, for lack of a better term lazier about things like this. If a guy is just happy enough and gets just enough of his needs met chances are he will not go anywhere, he might think about it heavily, he might even cheat here and there. But to start all over, new relationship, learn a new person, too much work...besides he was happy enough before. Point being that everyone thinks about another life, perhaps a better life, I take that back most think about those things. I suppose there is a little hunter in all of us, but this term makes me think of the 'art' of the hunt. Or at least making it into an art, being so good people don't even see it coming. By that description...uh huh that's me. Watch out or don't gonna get ya anyways.
-n

Photo of Clouded Leopard, National Zoo

House Smoke and Chili

We'll not talk about the parking in this area, the U street strip is surrounded by residential properties which means parking if you are a lucky, lucky duck or you stock someone all the way to their spot ::stop laughing if you do that:: I should've called Steve tonight AA is my co-pilot, we head into the city with plans to see an old friend and maybe hear a song or two. We arrive in the U street corridor and where people are buzzing around and crowding into the many venues that line a three block radius. I don't visit here often a little too far from everything, as you know I like to hop around a bit. But there has been a request for my appearance that I would never deny.

After rounding the block a couple of times we find a spot, walking down the street there are structures in all different stages, some boarded up, some gutted, some the same for 50+ years and some brand spakin new using up ever little inch of lot they rest on. It's an interesting neighborhood, on the edge of an interesting and amazing time.

We see our guide light in the form of a red sign, that has been seen that much more often since Obamas recent visit, which is great for the already famous Bens Chili Bowl. But the old stand that is so well known among the neighborhood is not our destination tonight. We're going next door literally, to an understated entrance of Ben's sister location, Ben's Next Door. An lounge, bar, upscale version of the it's neighbor. Next Door boast over forty feet of bar length, elegant decorations, seated bar area, dining room, complete with celebrity chef Rock, you may know him from a couple season ago of Hell's Kitchen. But tonight we're in for a 'first glance' house smoke, and friends. We walk in and the bar gives quite the dramatic entrance, lining the whole right side of the space, the left side filled with hightops and chairs. It's comfortable and the crowd is a mix, just all over the place in a good way, no one could possible feel out of place with all these people here. We start with a couple of cocktails AA the Blueberry Caiprioska and I choose the Citrus District, lemoncello cocktail sounds attractive tonight. We've originally come for just a drink and a little catching up with one of Ben's grandsons and long time friend Logan, all in the family this will stay, he helps run daily and works his tootie off. From the days of seeing him behind the bar, he'd light my drinks on fire to a day when we both get to watch great futures roll out.
We stay longer than expected of course, and my stomach starts to take notice, he must've noticed the look in my eyes. Because as I reach for the menu I'm greeted with a House Smoke with Chili, I smile ear to ear of course when food is involved and dig in. An interesting note, is you are constantly greeted with the great smells of house smokes and chili, there is a rotisserie right behind the bar! It's great, worth all the talk. We have other stops in the night so we promise to return for a taste of the upscale soul food. Kisses and hugs are exchanged and we're walking down the bustling streets of dc, out night is in mid term but many night are just beginning, something I've always like about the city.